1cappucino2sugar

In these last months I felt that I did nothing much and that I’ve spent time doing nothing that really what I’ve wanted or expected. Or to make it easy… I GOT STUCKED! STUCKED in my own life.

Gosh… I felt so horrible yet I felt that I’ve made my choices I need to be responssible with my own choices. which was… went back home to Indo.

There are days when I felt that I made a WRONG decision. There are days that when I felt made a right decision.

I felt WRONG when I realised that I’ve nothing to do here. I spent my time doing nothing.  I’m ashamed with myself. Oh God.

I felt right… *which is still questionable up until now, even though certain things happened and proven to be a right reason for me to be home.* when I was totally sick and needed help from experts, and I was finally operated and cured. And u know what… I felt right because I finally know how to DRIVE! hehehehe (and I already ‘bang’- ed/ smashed my car into my own house’s gate) hahaha ;p

So now… I begin to question, is it true life goes on? if it’s true life goes on, then why don’t I have something that really make my life feels like going forward?

Ps: To Jan, if she read this… Jan… I miss u and ur spirit of life. I’m pretty lost…